Him

I smile
when I think of his gentle face
My heart skips beats
when I recall his tender voice
His name
His smile
What has become of me?
I hang on every word he said
I sketch his smile
I smile at the thought of him.
I feel the happiness in his laughter.

I’m taking a wrong turn,
By choosing the right person.
He is right
My choice is wrong.

Irrational
Hopeless
Obsession
Magnifying
the current.

Condemn.

My heart belongs to me
My mind
Oh, my hope
My mind is
playing with the thought
that he is giving up
his heart
…and give it to me.

QN 05.27.2012

Ok so I’m a selfish bitch but it’s a nice poem for…at the moment.

September Rain

found this baby while looking for a rain mp3…

it’s been a good 4 years.

Mưa Tháng Chín

September Rain

brown

i start to love brown
encompassing, color of dirt
warm embrace, peacefulness
simpleton, noble silence
heal.

i learn to love the colors given by mother earth
brownness of trunk, sweet pink of petals
radiant yellow from the sun shinning up-bove
freshness green holds dark veins of leaves
the shyness of fragrant from a wild flower
when i recognize it, growing proudly
on the side of the dirt path
whispers from the wind, so soft and so clear
sound of the river flow when finding its way
to embrace the rocks
liveliness of birds, chirping “hello”
while clouds dancing with blue sky
smile.

i learn to love the simpleness
the wonderful things i’ve forgotten
coolness of breathe, warmness of touch
vibrant of light, resonance of sound
rhythm of heart beats, gesture movement
breathing in. breathing out.
to be with myself. the oneness within.
home.

Q 04.30.2012
Garden Grove, CA

for Li Bai

 

Trăng kia ai thả mà trôi
Cùng mây với nước bồi bồi múa ca?
Lung linh một bóng một ta
Trăng trôi trăng nổi biết là thật? hư?

——

Sóng biển trùng trùng sóng biển reo
Thuyền ta ngược sóng, thuyền ta chèo
Ung dung tự tại đời thanh thảng
Cùng sóng cuồng phong ta hát theo …

Ai cũng nghĩ đời là bể khổ
Ta yêu đời …ta có lỗ không ta?


do i believe?


Finding myself awake and broken
Do I believe in what I see?
The picture was painted so perfectly
I should believe…in what I see

Pumping the engine …
…to turn the motionless wheel
Yes, it is Time that we steal
Do you believe in what you see?
Because a part of me
…begs to agree

How true is it to Love?
How true is it to Life?
or are we just living a lie?
It’s in your heart and it’s mine
We fight for what we can’t deny
The beauty of Love, magic of Life
and the unexplainable desires

I do believe in what I see
in the engine of the Heart
and the motion of Life
in live life to its fullest
by pursuing one’s heart’s desires



i just want to curl up and hide in a place where nothingness exists. i realize that i’ve everything but lost a lot, so i cry with a smile on my face. such a strange place and stage i’m in right now. the push and the pull. i know that in order to find my peace of mind, i need to put things into perspective. but how? i started counting how many friends i still have. i started to count my blessings. i started to hold on to every emotions i feel. i feel tired. very tired. three friends in four months is too much for me to handle.  my heart aches. i don’t think i can take much any longer. i feel like everything is on hold right now. right now, i want to pull the duvet over my head and just fall asleep. but i can’t.

my heart hurts.