I can’t sleep tonite. Don’t even have a reason why. Thought of you keep on floating around. I know if you were here, you would miss me too. Thought of you would lie on your bed, in soft pillow and warm blanket makes me less worry a bit. I don’t have to worry much about you anymore as you’re at the same pace as I am. The atmosphere tonite is a bit cold. I know that it would be colder where you are. I wish that I could be where you’re at. I can’t write love letters like I used to…to you; maybe it is at the point that I’m realized there is no more you. You can’t read my letters, you can’t be with me. It’s the choice that we both didn’t made but faith has brought us here. The broken point. I can’t believe, tonight, I’m playing our song over and over and over again. Most people say it is a sleepy melody… to me it’s restless. Just like our love once was. How can someone compose something so beautifully? how can someone love so deeply? how can someone can’t let go peacefully? Honey, I wish i know. I wish I know all the answers like thousands of things that I know. I wish I know millions of things that I don’t know. I wish I know why we’d fallen apart?

This melody makes me sleepless, makes me restless.

Tomorrow is P’s wedding’s day. Everytime I attend a wedding, I think of us. It’s been 2 weddings since we’re not together. The last wedding when i was with you, it was wonderful, beautiful, the most powerful time that has struck me–the thought that our wedding day would be someday near. It has never come. That day has never come. Being with you and waiting for thát day has grown my patience, killed my anxiety, and has planned my hopes and faith.

Faith and hopes are what I’m living for all my life. Faith brought us together, hope brought us future. but soon, one by one has gone. What’s left is just me and myself and our songs. The good old days lingers on the notes, brought back the memories.

I know you can sleep, I cant. I know that you would think of me like i would of you. I know that life would be so much better if we’ve compromised and have faith. It’s been a long long road for me when i’m without you. It’s been cold and lonely. It’s been meaningless and blank. It’s been everything thát you could taken away from me only if you were here. Maybe one day you’d forget, maybe I’d forget. Maybe. Maybe that day never come.

it was Bach’s Minuet in G Major that was playing.